stripped bare

The New New Year

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The New Year came early for me.

Starting in November, I’ve made so many changes in my life, big and small, that it’s almost as if I’ve finally grown up. I’ve been at my company for more than year now. I had told myself some months back that I have to keep myself in this company for at least 12 months, to gain experience, to make my resume more credible. Maybe I’ve finally found a job I can settle into. This is quite an achievement for someone who never really knew what she wanted to do. I found myself giving advice to an ex-classmate last week. She was in the top class in my secondary school (and the Principal’s daughter) and went on to the top Junior College during our time. Now she’s finally finishing her PhD and doesn’t know what to do with her life.

I’ve also actually started to save. I started a new savings account that automatically draws a pre-established amount from my current account so that I won’t have to suffer the physical pain of transferring an amount over. I’ve also begun to make calculated payments for my purchases so that I can accumulate $1 gold coins and save them in a tin box I’ve allocated to store them. You won’t understand how proud I am of myself for managing to do this without crumbling.

I have put on quite a bit of weight ever since I started working in this company, which is situated right smack in the middle of an almost food paradise. My parents take turns to remind me of that fact every day and I initially felt resentment at how tactless parents can be when it comes to their children’s body issues. After I quietly took in all the insults and erupted into a vicious hatred for my body, I stopped asking D the “Do you still love me now that I’m fat” question and signed up for a full course of body slimming treatments at FIL.

I’ve also bitten the bullet and got myself a new look. I haven’t changed my hair for the longest time, and after consulting my people in the “industry”, I went and snipped off my fringe. My hairstylist was so happy with my new look he couldn’t stop giving me suggestions on how I could style my hair. The reviews were mixed though. Some loved it; some simply said I looked “Different”. “Different” can mean many things.

I have two more things to do before my year is complete. I intend to give my room a makeover as well, though it’s really dragging because of the endless overtime I have to do at work. I still haven’t gotten myself enrolled in a Japanese language school as well, and this is the one big regret of the year. In the grand scheme of things, I guess some things just have to wait.

I need to go to Japan soon.


Written by smudgi3

December 11, 2008, Thursday at 15:24

Posted in Dear Diary, Insight

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