stripped bare

The New 2006 – The Day After

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Maybe I’m too much of a busybody. I unwittingly make other people’s problems mine. I take someone else’s misery, make it my own, and then hand out suggestions and advice. Not that anyone heeds it. Or worse, they beat down my goodwill with lots of Ifs, Buts and Maybes.

Maybe all they need is a listening ear. A faceless, unemotional person at the other end of the line who makes the right sounds at the right times. Maybe they do not need advice at all because they’ve already made up their minds about what to do even before they call you. If your suggestions match up with their earlier decision, then good, it’s a marvelous plan. If you both had differing ideas, then well, theirs was better to start with. Even if you’ve called them up with your own problems, you’ll end up listening to theirs because, well, their problems are always bigger than yours. Perhaps all they need is for something they can hear the breathing of, and then hope you’ll forget whatever they’ve told you before, so that they could repeat the same tragic experience to you all over again. Word for word. And then some.

Pillar of strength. So this is what it’s all about. A cold, unmoving, non-living thing. Maybe I should start learning to be accommodating, unfeeling, forgetful and opinionless. After all, their business isn’t my business, right? There’s no need for conversations these days. My phone number is on everyone’s speed dial with the tag “Rubbish Bin” on it. Just call, unburden, do it again tomorrow.

Because you see, my life is perfect, peachy, a bed of roses, Christmas everyday. Nobody really has to listen to what I’ve got to say. My thoughts only cost a penny; my words – only two cents’ worth. How can my advice be good, when I’m not the one experiencing what they did.

Yes. This is my first written resolution in a long long time, for Year 2006 : To master The Art of Emotional Distancing and Shutting The Fuck Up.


Written by smudgi3

January 2, 2006, Monday at 02:20

Posted in Dear Diary, Insight

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