stripped bare

If I join SQ now I’d be an Old Girl, not SG Girl

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This is quite a difficult period of rest for me.

While I’m enjoying the freedom of being able to sleep til 2pm everyday and doing absolutely nothing but playing computer games and watching tv, there’s a nagging feeling at the back of my head. It’s called Guilt, I think. I need money to survive (to shop and live comfortably) and what I have every month now is simply too tight. Moreover, I have a Bangkok trip coming up (yes, the excitement is finally building up) and if I’m gonna enjoy myself, I need lotsa $$.

So far, I’ve been looking (inactively) for jobs online. Actually I’m just relying on the emails those online job search companies send me. So you can tell I’m not exactly enthusiastic. There’ve been 2 jobs I might just consider but I’m too freaking lazy to beef up my resume and send it out. Maybe I’m afraid that by sending it out and then actually getting the job, I would have killed off my own freedom.

And my mother is not helping, as usual. Recently, a temp job has become available in her department and she’s almost forcing me out of bed every morning to go to work with her. I’ve worked with her department 2 or 3 times, tracking fleet and maintaining accounts – 3/4 of the time I was bored to death! Sometimes I even sneak to the toilet to catch cat naps. Staring at numbers on the screen isn’t exactly my idea of a job. Other than working there, either my mother would be match making me off to the available (but not so eligible) guys in the building, or people from other floors would be coming in just to sneak a look at me. News travel fast, and my mum is quite a popular figure. And they would remark such insensitive words such as “Wah! You both look more like sisters leh!” and “Wah, our company never had a mother-and-daughter team before hor?” and “Your daughter graduate from where? How come no boyfriend?”

No no, my mum works in a shipping firm, not a wet market.

If only I’m not giving tuition right now, then maybe the job searching process would be easier. I cannot think of abandoning them right in the middle of a school year. On the other hand, the thought of having to work office hours and then give tuition 4 times a week is quite daunting. And the moey I get from tuition has been the sustenance that has kept me alive and comfortable for so long.

My ideal job now would be to do Freelance Something. But what thing?


Written by smudgi3

July 5, 2005, Tuesday at 14:02

Posted in Dear Diary

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