The LoAFS Theory
Love At First Sight.
Dunno why I keep hearing this phrase these recent weeks. Government Propoganda? My subconsciousness? My married friends?
When I was younger, I experienced the LoAFS syndrome several times over. Or so I thought. Who’s to define love? The many super stars, boy bands, crushes and infatuations that I managed to inflict upon my fragile heart were those experiences. All the way til I graduated from secondary school, I fell in and out of ‘love’ like, hmm… 27 times.
It was only a year later, after the broken hearts and painful tears, that I took the Lo out of LoAFS, threw it in disgust on the floor, put my full weight on it, and stomped it to its death. No, I didn’t turn into an angst-ridden punk. Hate only appears where there’s Love. Instead, I grew up, and translated the experiences into LuAFS.
Lust At First Sight.
Sounds really R21 and sinful but it makes sense. Maybe at 14 years of age, stirrings only occurred in hearts, and not the loins. But at the ripe old age of 17, when alcohol and clubbing starts becoming a topic of taboo, love starts ebbing out of the picture. Can lust be defined? Now, now, don’t be a pervert.
Basically, you have to be attracted to a person at first sight. Is that love or lust? You can lust after a body part but you can’t love it – not until you’ve indulged in that lust and fall in love with the body part’s owner (that’s where the “I love you, so I love your small tits” thing come in). You see, don’t be fooled by the word ‘Lust’. It isn’t always sexual.
When you first meet someone, whose personality/looks enthralled you so much that you just have to get to know her/him better, you already start to find that person desirable. But it doesn’t mean that you want to jump that person right there and then. OKay, who am I kidding? I’d jump Jay Chou anytime if I can get my hands on him. (Stop complaining J, you’re always too tired)
Maybe I’m taking the word Love too literally. I have an aversion for those “Our love is forever” people. I’m almost allergic to my married friends now. When I hear them read their wedding vows, it’s all I can do to keep my cynical snort in. Chances are, only the newly weds, teenagers and those who’ve never been in a relationship will believe in LoAFS.
Or they’re really confused.